Right now, I’m sitting outside the school with a lump in my throat. My stomach is churning, wondering if today is the day he faints for the first time?

How does a parent live, after watching their child die?

I’m sharing a business story of giving and growth. To prove that profit and purpose DO go together. To encourage more Australian business owners to intentionally add giving to their budget. To consider at least one of the innumerable social and environmental needs national or internationally and then work out what they’re going to give to that. To add giving as a budget line item with a dollar value next to it first, then budget from what’s left.

The biggest personal challenge I’ve had with the sacrificial nature of being a business owner is learning not to keep burning out.

I’ve been reminded of the fragility of life. In two so very different ways.

My youngest child is now somehow turning five. He’ll be starting school next year and I’ll be heading to my last ever kinder Christmas concert. I’ve been feeling such a mix of emotions, all tinged with a big dose of motherly guilty. But most of all, a deep sense of gratitude and contentment that I have been able to raise three children.

This virus has made me sad to the core, because it’s changing some of the fundamentals of the way we do life. And while we’re locking down to try and prevent the spread of a deadly disease, lockdown is also increasing the frequency and impact of other social issues, like domestic violence, relationship breakdown and social isolation.

Whether you’re struggling in your current situation or are on the cusp of something new, here are ten things I’ve learnt from the whirlwind of a personal and business ride I’ve been on.

It’s time to make a decision. And the quicker you make it, the greater the chance your organisation or business will have of surviving the many downturns we are already seeing the Coronavirus (COVID-19) bring.

Advice for Funding Bodies & Funding Recipients in relation to the Bushfires and Coronavirus COVID-19.

It’s checkup day. Tom’s has his blood pressure, sats, height and weight checked. Now we’re up to the echo. Otherwise known as limbo land. There is no other moment in life that makes me feel so much like I’m nowhere. We’re not living our normal every day life, we’re not in the clear, we’re not back on closer together checkups, and we’re not on a surgery waiting list.

Did you know that physiologically, both excitement and anxiety present very similarly?

I never used to be a fearful person. I wasn’t a stress-head or a worst-case scenario thinker. I had never had a panic attack, or even been close to one. But that was before our HeartKid was born.

It’s the giving in and giving out that I’m starting to think go hand in hand. If we focus on others alone, we can burn out and struggle ourselves both physically and mentally. Yet if we focus on ourselves alone, we’re missing the opportunity to gain perspective and see the good in our situation.

Most people know one of my ‘lemons’ is the Congenital Heart Disease (CHD) our oldest son was born with. But this past year, we’ve had another health-related lemon land in our court.

It’s like a little firework of thoughts goes off in your mind in about 5 seconds flat. There is a mix of actual rational thoughts, like the question of our coping ability at the moment, then there are the crazy, not so important thoughts, like being able to water the garden tomorrow.

There is something about a new year. I know it’s just another day, which technically doesn’t change anything from yesterday, yet there is still something undeniably different about the first day of a new year. I’m wondering whether it’s because there is an underlying sense of expectation. That something will be different. That things will change.

2018. I don’t even know where to begin with you.

As we keep racing around, we’re actually missing all those little moments that make up the beautiful bits of life. We need to stop. And breathe. We need to slow down.